Tradeoffs and lessons February 13, 2012
Posted by midnightzimadreams in 30-day resolution of 2012, Education, Fitness, Healthcare, Life.add a comment
I woke up this morning mad at myself. I slept in, knowingly. I have so much homework and so much reading to catch up on. Nate is right – I can’t go through grad school the way I did through undergrad – with minimal reading and paying very close attention in lecture and just reviewing the detailed notes I took in preparation for tests.
I was nervous about econ and a surprise quiz today. It happened, but luckily I did OK because the TA was awesome and went through stuff in quiz section and the professor repeated it in class, so my old habits form undergrad helped. But I know I can’t keep getting away like that and I don’t want to – I want to study and read and really grasp things, which means a lot more outside time dedicated to school work than I currently allocate.
That all leads me to my step class training fiasco. I was happy with my decision to take this on. And still am. But I need to make peace with the sunk costs, have fun for the rest of the quarter and gracefully bow out. For two reasons: primarily that the instructor training me doesn’t seem to think I’m capable of actually doing the job; and secondly, but perhaps even more importantly, I should be dedicating my time to school work and using exercise as a stress-relief mechanism, not a source of additional stress.
Nate is right here again – I shouldn’t let one person’s opinion (this trainer) get to me. After all, she’s been doing this for a lot longer than I have and I’m only now starting to learn how to teach step… or any fitness class for that matter… or anything fitness-related. And teaching is a lot different from doing. Not to say my fate is sealed either, but I’m also thinking I won’t be able to dedicate the extra time needed in training on my own through the rest of the quarter in order to just focus on being relaxed and energizing in the classes themselves. So, I will aim to learn as much as I can but above all – try to have fun for the rest of the term and then cut things off and switch to taking classes for fun, relaxation and focus (besides, the way my grad school class schedule is looking like for next quarter, I would have a conflict with the step class anyway).
I am afraid of this thought bubbling up because it feels hypocritical and snobbish at this time, but I also am not crazy about my trainer’s style of step coaching either… so in that sense, Nate’s getting to the heart of it in that people have different preferences. I do feel bad, though, that it’s turning out I may have wasted her time… maybe not entirely, but definitely somewhat.
Now on to the positive side of all this: I still am glad I took a chance on learnign this for 3 reasons:
1) It’s a safe environment to do it and I wouldn’t have taken on learning how to coach step if it were in almost any other circumstance;
2) I now know that it isn’t for me; at least not here and within this style; I may consider picking it up again another time, but most likely not – I have a new level of appreciation of just enjoying the step as a participant! There is something true about my trainer’s perspective that a large part of this type of work is personality; the fact that I have the technique down and that I am not afraid of getting up in front of a group of people anymore isn’t necessarily the same thing as being energetic and positively shining enough to inspire people to have fun;
3) I am re-learning, at a new level and in a new context, a lesson I already knew – a deep appreciation and respect for the work of others who are talented in their field; that goes especially for teachers who have to not only be experts in their subject, but be very good at teaching and that’s a whole other craft; and also for people like nurses or doctors who have to not only be extremely strong science students, skilled/talented practitioners, but also effective people-communicators (at least for most specialties) because without that last bit – patients wouldn’t get the full benefit of education and sustainable recovery.
Net: teaching is a rare talent. Like singing which I sorely wish I could do well, because it seems like it would be a lot of fun. I wish I had a knack for teaching because it seems like it would be very gratifying.
But knowing more and more that I don’t have that teaching chromosome (to mix my metaphors), oddly encourages me in my pursuit of education policy as a career. I think/hope that my regained level of appreciation for talent in teaching will help me prize that highly and work to protect and nurture it – both for the sake of teachers but also for the sake of students and society more broadly.
Recipes for healthier, older life January 15, 2012
Posted by midnightzimadreams in 30-day resolution of 2012, Fitness, Food, Healthcare, Life, Reading, Superfluous musings.add a comment
One of the themes really hitting home these last few weeks – around the winter holidays, really – has been the strongest metabolism drop I’ve experienced yet. It has to be something about almost-30. Maybe I’m half-imagining. Maybe less stress = more calories intaken. Maybe taking classes at the university gym is just less intense of a regular workout. But mostly, I think it’s eating the same as I always have. I need to really start cooking more at home and eating smarter when we go out. I’ve got to follow up on my from-scratch once-per-week minimum at home cooking goal and always making a sandwich or salad for school. I have *got* to drop off on chocolate or cookies – especially the store-bought kind. And I must fill up with veggies and fruit and lots of water. Another sure helper-way is probably sleeping better – i.e. go to bed on time, wake up early and get a lot accomplished.
For now, red wine and Downton Abbey, followed by “Pride and Prejudice” reading before bed time. Cheers and good night.
Nope, definitely don’t get why people do plastic surgery September 23, 2010
Posted by midnightzimadreams in Healthcare.add a comment
I’ve always thought plastic surgery was the strangest thing anyone could do to their body. I always said I would only ever have cosmetic surgery if it was for health or restorative purposes – i.e. in cases of breast cancer where a lot of tissue is removed or an accident that leaves a face or other body parts disfigured.
I underwent some minor, outpatient surgery earlier this week to remove a suspected innocent lump in my right breast and I have to say – now more than ever I don’t get it. It’s not that the pain was that bad. The incision is barely noticeable. What hurts is the bruise where they had to dig in and pull out the balled-up tissue. And mine was rather small, so I can’t even imagine the discomfort of having a huge foreign object *inserted* rather than removed… It’s all been a very awkward and unpleasant ordeal. Yet, strangely de-ja-vu-ish. Possibly because my only other surgery, as such, was when I was about 7 and it was for shortening the muscle in a lazy eye. Another very awkward surgery, if I may only be judging from a very limited set of experiences.
Perhaps even more poignantly, it has me wondering what it is about our (U.S.) healthcare system that makes a few hours’ procedure into a $10K+ expense. That’s just an estimate too, I’ll do my best to share the actual cost if I ever do figure out between my insurance agency’s confusing explanations, the slew of different invoices I’m about to get from the surgeon, from the hospital, from the anesthesiologist, etc. Only because I find it all fascinating. Perhaps it’s all about efficiency, but I spoke to at least … let’s see… 10 people from check-in 2 hours before the procedure was scheduled through check-out. And that didn’t include the lab that did my urine sample testing and the pharmacist because my mother came to see me and picked up the pain meds. There was also a lot of resources spent on me, things like pajamas, custom wrist band, paper bag for my personal clothes, cap for my hair, two pillows, countless warm blankets, all the tubes and devices for an IV, etc. So, I kind of get it and I can’t complain – I was comfortable and felt safe and all the doctors and nurses I interacted with were fantastic – my surgeon and anesthesiologist rocked. But $10K… really? How is this feasible and affordable? For a straight-forward, quick, outpatient procedure.
Oh, I didn’t even think about the lab that’s doing the biopsy and my pre- and post-op surgeon appointments, and and time spent with the surgery scheduler, on the phone with various healthcare industry staff trying to get an estimate from the surgeon’s office, from the hospital and from my insurance about the overall cost, all in pieces. *sigh* There has to be a simpler way.
Hodgepodge catch-up post July 28, 2009
Posted by midnightzimadreams in Civics, Gibberish, Healthcare, Life, Media, New Media, Superfluous musings, Technology.add a comment
Life has definitely been a whirlwind in the past few months. After a layoff, several long weeks of semi-disheartened job searching, grandmother traveling back to Europe, sister’s graduation, new job (which was a surprise and has become a great learning experience), and lots of reconnections with friends, one moving wedding, and finally an apartment selection (and one more wedding prep), I have decided I’ll never “find” time to resume blogging. I had even taken to sending myself e-mails from my new smart phone (wow, never had a pocket-sized computer that makes phone calls before; they’re truly come along way, despite all the criticism) during my long commute via ferry – all with subject line “blog” and a sentence or two on a topic that was capitalizing my attention that day. Well, I won’t get around to developing full blog posts out of each e-mail, so here’s a hodgepodge list, just to get it out there and hopefully start blogging somewhat regularly again:
Celebrity deaths – what do they tell us? – I thought about this when news about Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, Billy Mays, Walter Cronkite (and I’m sure I’m forgetting someone) hit within a few short days of each other. Beyond the stories I was reading about online journalism, mobile technology, etc. and how these worldwide (in case of MJ) news bits profliferated many new technologies, I was thinking that a lot of these folks were fairly young and succumbed to either cancer, heart disease, or drugs (prescrption and otherwise) – worth pondering what these trends say about U.S. healthcare issues in light of the healthcare reform debate currently playing out in government.
The world as a community – I’m not sure what I was thinking exactly here, but in that e-mail I’ve written: “Obama approach – the global community organizer? Will that work?” Pretty cool to think about how global of a community we truly are – global warming, global economic crisis, global flu epidemic (that spread lightning fast), global mourning of Michael Jackson, etc. If anything, the United States is lucky to have so global of a leader again (I think the last to be revered abroad was Bill Clinton).
Why are we so afraid of government meddling – This was a thought brought about by the healthcare reform debates I kept hearing on NPR on my commute to and from work. To quote myself again from that e-mail: “Isn’t that the point of representative government? If they really mean it, why aren’t (Republican) politicians declining their government health plans & buying their own – after all that is the ultimate free market.” No need to elaborate here, I think (except to reiterate how irritated I am by blatant and not unintentional hypocrisy).
Reaction to NPR healthcare story on All Things Considered (July 1) – “Gov $ already going more & more to healthcare & decisions are out of patients’ hands b/c of insurance rules & coverage patterns, not b/c of gov bureucrats… & it’s much costlier often than just treating…” – basically what I always take issue with when Republican (and some Blue Dog Democrats) talk about the danger of having the government make healthcare decisions for you instead of that being up to you and your doctor. Hah! Who makes those decisions now? Insurance companies. They must know better than the government. (And don’t even get me started on the whole argument of whether the government will encroach that much into the decisions anyway.)
Media splinters – As a PR professional, I started in fall 2006 targeting “top tier” publications; today, for the best impact, we target “niche” publications – audiences have splintered into specialized interests thanks to the bloggosphere, other new media on the Internet, a-la-carte news and opinion even on cable news TV networks. It took something like MJ’s death to bring the whole world’s attention to one story, like a lazer beam.
Are we all spoiled consumers? – “Do we expect too much from our technology, too fast? Can’t help but wonder, reading all the new smart phone reviews (partial to Palm Pre – small keyboard actually a + for me, but would like better/more solid hardware & more apps..)”
The return of yard and garage sales – Is this a sign of the (tough economic) times? I can’t remember when was the last time I saw a sign for a garage sale and they were everywhere in the late 1990s when my family first moved to the United States. All of a sudden this summer they’re everywhere again.
Historical moments January 26, 2009
Posted by midnightzimadreams in Civics, Elections 2008, Life, Work.add a comment
Inauguration Day 2009 is one of those dates taht I believe people will recall with the “where were you when …” prompt. I was at home, then listening to NPR on my commute (on foot and Max) and then at my desk at work, watching the event on NYTimes.com. That evening, my boyfriend and I went to the Oregon Democratic Party celebration (the dance party at a local club one, not the $100+ per plate dinner). The sight and sounds were incredible. Young and not-so-young people, dance music, live DJ. And then they stopped all and replayed the President’s inaugural speech on two large screens. Everyone listened, everyone applauded right at the natural pauses. It was elecrtifying. What a difference a crowd makes – feeling connected and experiencing other people’s reactions elicited one more wave of emotionally overwhelming thrill.
The one morsel I would like to take away from the experience is the call to action – to volunteer and to keep a strong work ethic in these trouble times. May we all remain as driven and active as the President has demonstrated to be the day after.
Transparent and accessible government January 14, 2009
Posted by midnightzimadreams in Civics, Elections 2008, New Media, Superfluous musings.add a comment
The Obama transition team continues to amaze me. I am in awe at how accessible and engaged they are portraying the President-elect to be.
I was very pleasantly … well, not surprised, not really … when the team announced, via Michelle Obama, their call for a day (and/or weekend) of volunteer service for the MLK Jr. holiday this year, just before the innauguraiton. But what is truly an innovative idea is the “Citizen’s Briefing Book.” I first received the e-mail addressed from Valerie Jarrett (co-chair of the Obama-Biden Transition Project ) this morning. It may have been distributed earlier and only reached me recently, but nonetheless, it is impressive when I log in the afternoon of the same day and there are already several thousand ideas collected. A glance at the list of recent topics and it is obvious these are serious, thoughtful ideas… no spamming here. Well, either that gets filtered out (which would also be indicative of the commitment on the Obama team’s side) or people are considerate and eager to get engaged. It’s probably a bit of both.
So, the book itself will be a collection of the most popular ideas submitted to this web site and it will be assembled in the same binder as the incoming President’s other briefing documents. He will actually look at it himself. Talk about a direct line to your top leader! Genious.
I hope his administration keeps up the fantastic job the campaign and transition team have done thus far to make ordinary people feel connected and engaged once again. It’s a mighty feat in today’s communication tools onslaught.
Being a part of history November 5, 2008
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People have already identified Nov. 4, 2008 as one of those days that everyone will recall – where were you when Barack Obama was elected president of the United States of America?
I was at home. Crying, overwhelmed by emotion. Watching the speeches and crowds on TV – all over the States and abroad as well! I printed a few front-pages of news organizations from around the world. I celebrated with my love and I couldn’t keep my eyes dry for more than 30 seconds at a time. But we wanted to feel more a part of the moment, so under the pretext of getting smoothies, we made our way to the local Democrats’ gathering place and sat among those moseying the hallways, leaving with their “President Obama” placards, or lingering to chat with friends – new and old. It felt electrifying, even though we arrived way past the time of elation, the speeches by both major party candidates. The mood was positive and uplifting. I know it is bitter to lose, but I also have had a sense of more warmth and unity from the Democratic side throughout this election season (all 2+ years of it). That feeling leaves me hopeful and peaceful today, the first full day with a President-Elect Barack Obama.
I am happy to have had the opportunity to be a voter in this momentous election.
“Hope Trumps Fear” November 4, 2008
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To quote someone very dear to me!
Congratulations to us all – Americans and global citizens alike.
Take it for what it is… November 4, 2008
Posted by midnightzimadreams in Civics, Education, Elections 2008, International Relations, Life, Reminiscing, Superfluous musings.add a comment
This is an excerpt from the personal testimony I submitted with my last tiny contribution to the Obama campaign sent online this weekend. I know there are a few typos and probably other errors, but I think it’s a good summary (albeit way too short) of reasons why I am so excited for tomorrow!
“I am saddened by the turn the country has taken since 2001. Sept. 11, 2001 was my first day of college classes and I was gripped by the attacks just like any other American, except I wasn’t yet a citizen and I felt the coldness toward recent immigrants almost paradoxically intertwined with the solidarity the country was experiencing. Today, I once again see hate and disillusionment bubbling up in the face of war, economic collapse, health care system deterioration, job loss, etc. This time, I have been inspired by the messages of hope and unity that the Barack Obama Presidential campaign has brought forth. I am confident an Obama/Biden administration will restore the world’s confidence and favor of the United States and in turn that will mean growth for the economy in this increasingly globalized era. I also know the health care plan from the Obama/Biden camp is the best (not the ideal, as there is no such thing) solution for that crisis. Growing up in one extreme (socialized medicine) to living my high school, college and professional life thus far in the other (the closest thing to free-market health system with insurance and drug companies), I know the answer must be in a balanced system somewhere in between the two.
There are many other reasons why I admire the Obama/Biden ticket, not the least of them because they are honest with the American people and encourage us to take personal responsibility and make smarter choices in our daily lives – from parents actively engaging in their children’s education to re-learning how to live within our means… But ultimately, I am simply lifted by the future-driven direction an Obama/Biden administration would take the country, by the unifying power of the messaging (bringing together all Americans, from all walks of life, experiences, backgrounds and aspirations), and by the positive, issues-focused political campaign so successfully run (with new and social media tactics that speak to the globalized, digitized youth)!”
The next president will be tested with an international crisis… November 4, 2008
Posted by midnightzimadreams in Elections 2008.add a comment
… let’s just hope the next president has caller ID.
As John Stewart says, sometimes those 3 a.m. calls are “Baba Booey.”
